Hm, I went yesterday sucks really hard. Ok, now I'm not even grade the offspring of a clown, but no matter. The day yesterday was just for the occasion today.
I naja probably a problem. I doubt in myself, to what I can do or will do. This is nothing new and also the following remarks are not new in the blog, or me in any event itself is the logical, not a very pleasant feeling, and somehow, like a reflex when I encounter such situations, rest my brain from my memories in order to identify similar situation and reconcile. I'm alone during their studies, or since the beginning of the course several times overwhelmed and simply felt too stupid. And we'll, somehow there was always a moment that has dispelled the doubts. Either that I had passed an exam but then, or a fellow student came to me and asks if we do something. Joar, something just happened forever. And that's also off the university or my self-doubt Sun I am convinced itself that I will go back in life anything bad. All was well so far. In the 8th Class remained seated, zack study law. At first rejected by the University of Mannheim, shortly before the semester starts but still a commitment. A girlfriend after 3 1 / 2 years lost, I bang someone great things at my side. And the examples go on and on. That's all well and good, but you mags I believe in any single time I've believed that it goes uphill again. Instead, every time I was on the verge of suicide risk (jap, pretty wimpy) and total down / depressed. And then came the redemption. This time I'm still in the phase "OMG everything shit" but somehow my brain has learned a step further. It skips already in the depressive phase approach because everything sucks so so and so, I come straight to the point where I virtually at redemption wait. This in turn makes me Kacklaune. Respectively. makes me doubt. Because, yes, in itself, it was always good, no question, but I've always emotionally ruined, only to find salvation (that sounds more Christian than my ego). Now I'm afraid that I know the invisible man, who supervised my life (a crappy idea, right?) Makes a spanner in the works, because I was not at all down properly and was therefore not worthy of encouragement.
Boarh sounds like it on my own level, like I was a paranoid schizophrenic and approach Freak? Well, maybe even help me the thought "Just do what you can do, do your utmost the rest is not in your hand "
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